Giant Metal Net

High above the border town
I can see the golden ground
If I wasn’t looking down
I might have lost you in the miles

Ocean blue and foaming white
surround the body of my flight
as I flew out of sight
You were turning in the stiles

and I know what it means to you
and I know what it means to me
and I know how it feels to be
burned by the sun, the sun
I love the sun

Now I’m sleeping on the sand
of an unfamiliar land
And I’m dreaming up a plan
to get you on the breeze

And I’m staring at the speck
Of the map laid on the deck
It’s time to make a trek
On forgiving seas

and I know what it means to you
and I know what it means to me
and I know how it feels to be
burned by the sun, the sun
I love the sun

and I know what it means to you
and I know what it means to me
and I know we all want to be
Burned by the sun

Beulah – Burned By The Sun

I made it out to the Great Sand Dunes National Monument last weekend along with my camping buddies Amanda, Reece, Greg, Mitch, Laura, Betsy, David and Mary. It was way cool. Actually, in the evening it was pretty damn cold. You wouldn’t think after getting a sunburn and sweating in shorts and a tee shirt during the day that you’d be freezing your butt off in a down sleeping bag, two pair of socks, jeans, tee shirt, sweatshirt, fleece coat, Baumeister Carhart coat, gloves and a hat at night, but you’d be wrong . I took about a million pictures (okay 138 pictures) so I can’t post all of them, but I’ll try and throw a nice sampler package up. Hey, does anyone want to know what South Park, Colorado looks like? Here it is:

Doesn’t look at all like a quiet little red-neck, po-dunk, white-trash, mountain town, does it? The country in southern Colorado is really beautiful if you like the whole purple mountain’s majesty, sweeping desert plains, breathtaking sunrises and sunsets thing. Here are a batch of shots I took when we drove into the park near sunset and then in the morning after thefuckincubscoutswokeusallupat5:30inthemorningyellingandscreaming. While lying there trying to ignore them and sleep just a little while longer, I heard one of the “adults” who were chaperoning the scouts talking about the loud people down the way from the night before. He was saying, “they were hootin’, hollerin’ and carrying on so loud I finally had to go over there and tell them to shut up.” No doubt the irony was lost on them.

So after everyone managed to get themselves together and the caffeine addicts got their coffee fix, we headed to the park. There’s a mountain stream of sorts that runs through the park that’s about 100 yards wide and 6 inches deep. It makes for a great place for folks to play in the water and the sunshine. Since the water is shallow, there were tons of little kids there building sand castles and dams, splashing in the water and chasing toy boats down stream. Apparently we have beaches here in Colorado, but they’re just like everything else here; they’re vertical. Later in the day, Betsy, Mitch, Laura, Reece and I decided to climb the dunes… well at least a little ways up anyway. After making our way up the first decent sized peak, we decided that to go all the way up to the top would just be redundant . Check out the shot of Laura way out in front, determined to get to the top first. She’s *so* competitive!

  

Of course there were the tourist traps that were a “must see” as well. First up were the Colorado Gators. You wouldn’t think Colorado weather would support gators, but these folks have a natural geothermal well that keeps the water at a gator comfortable 87 degrees. They boast 400+ gators along with ostrich, emu, snakes, monitor lizards, turtles, and a working tilapia fish farm. Check it, like the Lemon Jelly lyric goes, “and a big fella too!”:

 

My title this time out comes from a tale Reece regaled us with. Reece and Mitch were talking about the alligators, capturing them and how does one go about getting them up on land. Reece explained that the alligators were caught in a net. Mitch said, “well, wouldn’t the alligators just bite down and chew their way out of the net?” To which Reece, who was just riffin’ on the whole ‘gator thing said, “the net is made out of metal. Imagine being caught in a giant metal net….” as he raised his arms to show how large the net was supposed to be. During this same conversation, he and Laura were talking about the whale shark, the largest living fish species. Laura was explaining that while they did indeed have a giant mouth, they were “filter feeders” meaning they swim around with their mouths open feeding on whatever little things are suspended in the water. Reece claimed they also ate big things too. “Like what?” “Well, they eat moose.” “Moose?!” “Yeah, if one falls in the water they’ll eat it.” It truly is amazing what you can learn on these camping trips.

There’s also the worlds largest grain of sand. I’ve gotta tell ya, you don’t want to be around when those big ass dust devils start whipping these babies around.

But by far, the best stop we made was at the UFO Watchtower. Where do I start?!? There are apparently two cosmic vortexes (one spinning clockwise, the other spinning counter clockwise) that overlap RIGHT ON THE SITE OF THE WATCHTOWER!!! Conveniently, these vortexes are located right in the Healing Garden in front of the tower. Whatertheodds? To her credit, the lady that runs the place was lots of fun. Never made any claims, just said there are things out there that are unexplained. Tough to argue with that .

  

On the way home we traveled back through Leadville, the highest incorporated city in the United States (10,152 feet above sea level). Very cool Victorian era mining town. We also stopped by the Thai Mini Cafe in Poncha Springs. Yeah…. I *so* wanted it to be a gem of a find, I really did. John and Jim will recall the whole Tijuana ID fiasco that I will never be able to forget as long as they’re around? Well now it looks like “remember what happened the last time we let Greg choose the restaurant” will follow me around out here. But the sign *said* authentic damnit!

This Sunday is The Rocky Mountain Steel Guitar Show at the Grizzly Rose. Mitch is supposed to sit in with a guy he knows and we’re trying to get a few folks together to go. Between now and then however, I’ve got to do all my weekend stuff that I’ve neglected for the past two weeks. With that in mind, I’ll post this and try and get on with my chores . Write when you can.

- G

Million Dollar Idea

Father was the dentist cowboy who invented radar
Lassoing a molar, he pulled but it didn’t go far
Detecting the external potions with some spider x-rays
Constructing the internal organs with some vacuum tubes

Uncle was a leper b-boy in the CIA
Brazilian bossa rosa in the stupor of a clown of thorns
His sister suffered soggy syrup crackers with some breakfast tea
Sonata forming minions in the maiden of the microscopes

Grandfather was the dentist cowboy who invented radar
Lassoing a molar, he pulled but it didn’t go far
Detecting the external potions with some spider x-rays
Constructing the internal organs with some vacuum tubes

Mill Race – Riding The Root Canal

Yeah, I know, I know. But I’ve been busy ripping CDs, looking into mortgages, organizing the office/guest bedroom, arranging a trip to Seattle, thinking up million dollar ideas. Here’s my latest: change the iPod’s form factor so that it can be inserted into a drive like a cassette or CD. When I started to describe this to Mitch, he suggested making an MP3 player shaped like a cassette that could be inserted into a cassette player like those cassette adaptors. Just put the player in shuffle, insert into your car’s cassette player and go. Of course, that would be a great idea that might actually sell if you made an infomercial about it, but I’m not interested in actually making a product that works .

Here’s what *I* was thinking. If the iPod’s form factor was standardized along with the connector/protocol and these were made “open source”, any number of applications could be made. “iPod Drives” could be made for cars, computers, stereo receivers, Boom Boxes, TVs, in-wall home docks, the new Apple TV box… any number of places. And while I realize that there are cables or adaptors for all of the above applications, a standardized drive would be easier than tracking down an adaptor box/cable for each and every application. There’s the whole easier-for-friends-to-play-their-stuff-on-your-equipment thing. Plus, other products would be developed like removable hard drives in the same form factor and stuff….

 

So anyway, last weekend was the Kentucky Derby. Mitch, Laura and I made our way over to Greg McGrew’s place to watch. The day started with a quick check on-line of the odds.  Amanda, highly committed to the day as she was, took our bets and placed them in Las Vegas. Oh she’ll claim she was there on some work related nonsense, but the truth is she is a *HUGH* Derby fan and goes to Vegas every year to place bets for friends. I don’t remember what horses other people picked, but my horse came in 19th out of a field of 20. I had a shot of Laura, who really is a big fan, biting her nails and watching the race about 2 feet from the TV, but it’s not a very good shot and I don’t want my leg broken, so here’s a great picture of Cooper instead:

 

Sunday brought a trip to Mitch’s house for a jam session and a bit of grilling. Brit, Gabe and Mitch were putting it together in the studio while the wives and kids watched Fantasia. It ended up snowing up there at 9,000 feet over the weekend, so while people frolicked in the hot tub, Mitch shook his shovel and cursed the sky. Did you know that hot tub water really doesn’t affect the flavor of imitation crab stuffed mushroom caps and that you can put together a makeshift table in about 15 seconds using two saw horses, a piece of plywood, four nails, a bed sheet and an iron candle holder? It’s true.

 

There are other stories that have taken place during my hiatus like the office cleanup and the easy button, my return to the gym (OMG, the 5:30 am battle that happens every time), my stunned incredulousness at Tony Snow’s claim on Good Morning America that the Bush administration hasn’t tried to link Iraq with 911 (quote, “there’s been no attempt to try to link Saddam (Hussein) to September 11th” are you fucking kidding me?!? Here’s more. And more. Still more. Whatever.) But nothing all that special. This past week though, I was on my way up the mountains for a walk-through at a client’s place. I snapped a couple of shots on my way up and at their place. Imagine stepping outside to this view every morning.

  

I dunno, somewhere along the way I made the wrong choices or luck passed me by or something. Of course if that iPod idea comes through…. Anyway, I take quiet comfort in the knowledge that I have better music in my collection than they do .  Next weekend I’m camping with a group of folks at the Great Sand Dunes National Park. Hopefully I’ll have time to upload the pictures and write something about it. Talk to you then!

       – G